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Tell Damian you’ll have to call him back. I need to use your phone to call American Idol. I need to use your phone, your stepbrother Hakeem’s phone, and your grandmother’s rotary phone. We must call American Idol, and vote for Whynatte’s own Michael Johns. Yes we can.
I feel, smell, and look like a 15 year old girl. But I can’t help it. I’m actually calling American Idol. Not only am I calling American Idol, but I’m wearing a bluetooth headset and a new camisole, and repeatedly calling American Idol.
Here is a photo of Michael Johns. He is about to win American Idol, and he’s about to drink a fresh Whynatte. Not too shabby, and we’ll support him all the way ’til the creamy refreshing end.
Last night’s performance will send him into the top 12. Now I want to go light my shed on fire:
About The Author
jesse
Hello, I'm one of the co-founders of Whynatte, and currently handle the marketing, branding, and business development. I also handle the mail room, the black market primate side-operation, and most of the shipping and receiving. A little of this, a little of that. The fact that you're actually reading this indicates that you've lent us your time, and have an interest in Whynatte. Thank you. It's the gazillion people who've supported us along the way that make the difference. See you around....
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9 Responses and Counting...
I called. I’m proud. Yes we can.
The country is ready for change. I am ready for shrimp tempura.
I love you Michael Johns!!!!!!
He’s HOT and FABULOUS! When ‘n where is an ATL live “Mike” event?
I think he’s aussie-ome. Okay, that’s the dumbest thing I ever said. I just had to. But really, he’s in a class above the rest. He had a bit of a rough night tonight with the Fleetwood Mac song, but after last week’s smokin’ performance and all the auditions he’s blown us all away with, he’s entitled. He’s got a terrific voice and he’s quite refreshing. I appreciate the fact that he doesn’t cornily (is that a word?) ham it up before the cameras, even when he had to be the producers’ bitch for a day last week when they had to do the 60′s medley. He’s really something. Best male voice I’ve heard in years. Not bad on the old eyes either. Not at all.
Yeah, the aussie-ome thing made me throw up a little bit in my mouth, but that’s not such a bad thing since I’m trying to lose weight anyway.
I don’t know any of the other tricks on the show personally, but I can say that Mike is totally humble, and basically just a normal guy. Outside of the webbed toes. I agree with you completely – well said.
The guys all suck except MJ and Archuleta, and word on the street is that that little angel is actually a demon spawn of jezebel and therefore disqualified.
I heard that little archuleta fellow is actually a 42 year old man. He has the whole nation fooled.
Seriously though, he drives me absolutely fucking crazy. I want to send him away in a hot air balloon.
Can’t wait for him to come to the ATL for the hometown visit!! Whynatee Party for SURE!! Go Mike!! Atlanta has loved you for years and now so does the rest of the world!